Wednesday, May 13, 2015

No good deed.

I spent my evening last night handing out coffee and donuts to students taking and/or studying for finals. It was greatly appreciated by most of the students who stopped by my table, and I felt good doing something nice for them. I mean, I know first-hand how essential carbs are to academic success (that's why I gained so much weight in college). But, then, some "law school student" showed up and quickly ruined my night.

It started out okay. He and the woman he was with talked about how excited they were for commencement. I was excited for them, too. Then, they starting talking about how they went to a masquerade ball hosted by the university and everything went down hill from there. Law Bro quickly whipped out his phone to show us pictures of himself and his three dates... because he is so amazing that he carries three women around with him. This reminded him of his experience "representing" playboy bunnies, which he proved by showing us pictures of himself with more women. Isn't he so cool, you guys?

I very rapidly and instinctively looked away and started a conversation with someone else while my male coworker jumped in to talk to Law Bro. This offended Law Bro. Oh, you're not impressed? Well I don't want to talk to you anyway.

At that point I tried very hard to ignore him but he got louder and louder, name dropping all the people he's "represented" including, but not limited to, Mark Wahlberg and Slash. I probably don't know who Slash is, though, because I probably just watch Desperate Housewives. Or maybe he said Real Housewives. Either way, I continued to ignore him while screaming in my head.  Little do you know, I don't even have cable, mother fucker, so suck on that. 

Overall, it was a pretty horrific display of insecurity thinly masked by aggressive pomposity, and I was just a bitch for not being impressed by it. In fact, I was "just like every other woman" he knows. I can't imagine why that would be.


  1. how dare you not be impressed by how important and well connected he is? who do you think you are!?

    ... fuck men.

  2. My stomach is turning for you. I wish there were a way to deal with these types but every tactic just makes them bigger dbags, unfortunately. Also, Law Bro is amazing lol.


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