Each week, I will provide someone with sage advice about dating, using my extensive research in the field. Some of my experience includes:
@Drake CALL ME.
— Katie Qué (@imyourkatieque) April 11, 2014
This concept will only work if you all send me your questions, so please do so in the comments or via email at email@example.com. I envision this primarily being a dating advice column, but other questions are welcome, too. I also have a lot of expertise in peanut butter, for example.
We'll start off this week with an easy question, suggested by my aforementioned internet friend:
Dear Katie Qué,
What advice would you give to a guy going on a first date?
I didn't know you in high school
Dear "I didn't know you in high school",
First of all, arrive on time. No one wants to wait around for you (on that note, my sincerest apology to every guy I've ever gone out with). Also, bring a bag of bagels. At least a dozen -- you can freeze them. Why? Girls love carbs, for one thing. Secondly, it would be a subtle suggestion that maybe you'll have breakfast together the next day. Either way, it's a win win. Unless you fucking blow it.
Need advice? Then contact me immediately because my blog depends on it. Otherwise, have a great weekend.
Disclaimer: Katie Qué is not qualified to give advice on dating, or really anything, for that matter. She has never been in a serious relationship, unless you include that with fast food establishments, particularly Domino's. Please take everything she says with a grain of salt. Better yet, a slice of pizza.